Thursday, October 4

Jewish Holidays: a primer from the hard Left

Painting spotted in a Columbus, GA coffee shop. (Photograph: Dave Bender)

The Daily Kos weblog (uber-Left, for those just returning from exile on Saturn) recently posted a wickedly clever "explanation" of the Jewish holidays for the "covenentally challenged," apparently.

An excerpt:
"Thursday evening, September 27 starts Sukkot, the Jewish festival commemorating our ancestors wandering around with Moses 40 years in the wilderness (or as the less theatrical among us refer to it, the desert). Sukkot also tries to serve the incongruent purpose of celebrating the harvest – which one has reason to believe probably only happens every 40 years in the desert. Or perhaps never. FEMA was said to have been heavily involved in that relocation effort.

(Photos - ed.)
Our people wandering in desert. Our people wandering in mall.

"During Sukkot, Jews are supposed to "dwell" for 7 days in crude temporary shelters called sukkahs, because, why create a whole completely new word? These "dwellings" are meant to represent the ones our people had to schlep around in the desert for 40 years after leaving Egypt. As you'll see later, 40 is apparently not a terribly lucky number for our people, not even on a scratch off lottery ticket. More also on the construction of these sukkahs later.

"Sukkot runs, or to be more precise, sits, outside in these huts, through Wednesday evening, October 3. Immediately on the heels of Sukkot, Thursday, Oct. 4, we’ve got Shemini Atzeret, or as it is known technically "The Day after the Last Day of Sukkot." A holiday unusual in the Jewish calendar, because it is celebrated far more for when it is than for what it is. Shemini Atzeret is sometimes mistakenly referred to as the eighth day of the festival of Sukkot, simply because loosely translated Shemini Atzeret means "the eighth day of the festival of Sukkot." Go figure. The Talmud explains that there are six ways in which Shemini Atzeret is different from Sukkot, which you can learn only by reading the Talmud – because apparently nobody else is talking."
Read the rest. And as for the politics? Take an anti-nausea pill first...

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