that keeps on giving!
Having analyzed world media sympathies towards Muslim radicals who teach their young to lace their suicide belts with screws and rat poison to inflict maximum carnage in a crowd of infidels, a desperate Jewish manufacturer of educational toys has launched a " Jewish Martyr Babies" marketing campaign, which they hope will finally make Reuters, BBC, CNN, and other networks view the Jewish experiencehave more favorably. They now offer their customers anthrax yarmulke, razor-wire-lined tallit, exploding gartel, strangling attarah, metal-piercing dreidels, and other novelty items that are "fun, educational, and lethal."
"When asked if the new trend is going to change the way his organization reports the news, an unnamed Reuters Middle Eastern stringer scoffed, "'This is just one of their cheap Jew marketing tricks to earn undeserved sympathy. Life would be so much less complicated if they just didn't exist.'"
"If we want the world to start liking us, Jewish children need to stop learning useless Western ideas like arts and sciences, and start learning how to become fanatical holy martyrs bent on destroying everything that doesn't conform to their new, pious outlook. At that point, international human rights groups and all progressive people will finally welcome us into their community on par with Palestinians.
Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale! Sale!
UPDATE: This week only:
Free Torah pointer with each purchase, good for poking out eyes or creating neck wounds!